Tuesday, May 31, 2011

An Attitude Adjustment

If having a second child has taught me anything, it is this.
You can do SO much more than you ever thought. Although I have always wanted more than one child I had a panic attack about a month before Ainsley was born. HOW am I going to be able to love her as much as I do Anthony. HOW can I bond with her. HOW can I change two sets of diapers (we are STILL potty training Anthony), how can I afford for 2 kids to go to daycare, how and when am I going to take a shower, brush my hair, cook nutritious meals, go to school? After almost 7 months of living with those questions I have a simple answer: You just do.
It's so easy to fall into the mindset of "woe is me" and "life is too hard". It has really taken me a change in perspective to overcome this way of thinking, and I remember the exact moment it happend. It was one of the first Saturdays that I had the kids all by myself after Ainsley was born, right before Anthony's 2nd birthday. Both babies were being fussy, not sleeping, Anthony was having a HARD time with the idea of mommy not being able to just pick him up when he demanded it, and things were out.of.control! So much so that I just sat in the floor and cried. THEN, it hit me. Get up... this is NOT hard. Just take a breath, and do it. I regained composure put little Miss in her swing, got Anthony settled, and took a breath.
Ever since that meltdown and serious attitude adjustment things have been easier. Things are by no means easy, but they are easier. For starters, I have the most amazing baby ever. She never gets fussy anymore, she sleeps fantastic, and she lets me put her down. Anthony is beyond amazing too. He is so kind and gentle with his sister it brings tears to my eyes. He always tries to make her laugh, or if she's touching too rough he grabs her calmly and shows her how to "touch soft" on his arm. The jealousy and meanness between them never really existed, and I am so thankful for that.
I really do joke that life go easier with 2 babies than it was with 1. I think just relaxing helped out with that. I have great kids, an amazing husband who helps, a daycare that I could not be more proud of, a job that helps keep things rolling (for now), and great family to help out when things really do get overwhelming.
So let this be a word of encouragment to those who are struggling with a second child, or the idea of having a second child. It isn't that bad, and I have had SO many more good moments than bad. It really is amazing what you can accomplish that you never thought you could.

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